Deep Water

CHAPTER 1 -

‘OK… so… are you listening?’

‘Yes…’ Briony was standing by the open door to our sitting room. She flicked her long sleek brown hair over one shoulder and leaned her head against the doorframe. She was watching me with mild curiosity – one eyebrow raised, her large pale blue eyes steady and unblinking. ‘Go on then…’

‘OK….’ I cleared my throat nervously and read to her:

‘She turned her impassive, unremitting gaze from the cold, dead eyes and the pale, lifeless body lying prostrate on the sloping mudstone riverbank, and studied the purple stain of the darkening sky across the gaping, greedy mouth of the estuary. The last remnants of a fiery winter sunset ebbed quickly away into the chill of the encroaching night. Noisily, the turgid, swirling water slapped relentlessly, turning the shale and stones over and over and over again in a never-ending, remorseless clawing motion. Soon it would be dark, and the tidal current would be merciless in its journey along the fast-flowing river, and this sorry, wretched soul would be carried away, dragged silently to a watery grave, and no one would miss them – no one would know… or even care…”

‘So, what do you think?’ I asked in hopeful anticipation.

‘Um, well…yeah…’

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

‘Well, it’s…er…quite good…maybe needs a little tweaking.’

And there was I, thinking I had the best EVER opening paragraph to my new novel EVER written in the history of Crime Fiction.

‘What’s wrong with it, then?’ I said, irritably.

‘It’s just a bit…you know…flowery.’

‘FLOWERY!’

‘Yep.’

Talk about deflating a person’s ego, which by the way is more sensitive than Briony would appreciate, given that she seems to think I am emotionally stunted (I AM NOT EMOTIONALLY STUNTED, just in case you’re already taking sides.)

I looked at the expression on Briony’s little heart-shaped face and thought how insensitive she was being, for someone with such a sweet-looking face. Those big baby-blue eyes might fool some people, but she can really stick the knife in if she wants to.